This is my water bottle. It goes almost everywhere with me, encouraging me to drink my allotted amount of H2O.
You know that Two Week Wait? Well, it's over. The spotting has started, accompanied by the cramps. CD 1 starts tomorrow. (F*#k!)
If I was being honest with myself, I've known since 9 DPO. Every. Damn. Month. 9 DPO is my nemesis. I always get the twinges and I know.
On 10 DPO, I gently suggested to The Man that I didn't feel like it was our month. He practically bit my head off for even saying it because it wasn't over until I was full on bleeding. Great. He was pissed off because I shared the terrible news and ruined part of his day.
I wanted to say, "boo hoo". I wanted to say, "Too F-ing bad!" I wanted to scream at him for wanting me to shoulder the burden of knowing on my own while he lived blissfully in la-la land.
I didn't say any of it.
Mostly because we were less that half way through our walk through the park and surrounded by people and that could have gotten awkward quick. But also because I took a little time to think about it.
Just because my mind is filled with thoughts of my cycle day and night, just because I over-analyze every little twinge my body makes, just because I'm going crazy...it doesn't mean that he should have to. If I could shelter myself from every little symptom and just find out when my period showed (or didn't show), I totally would. So for now, I will vent here. I will save him just a little bit of agony.
He already has to deal with my grumpy, PMS-ing self. And no one should have to go through that :)
Vent all you want here. I find it works great to get it out and really think about it all and then sit down and have a good conversation with the Hubby.
ReplyDeleteHere is a great place to vent! My husband, who is usually alarmingly patient and understanding, has gotten annoyed with my constant thoughts of cycles, babies..., too! It does suck to be aware of every twinge, etc. It's a lot to handle! Vent away!!!
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