Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Still Cooking!

I'm still pregnant! Three cheers for that!
I was discharged home from the hospital at 30 weeks because, despite contracting every few minutes, I had not dilated further. At that time, the doctors were very concerned that I would deliver within two weeks and that it might happen really quickly, so I had strict instructions to not do much of anything and to call 911 at the first signs of labor. I am currently 33 2/7 weeks and feeling much more secure. I still am not allowed to pick up my daughter (or lift anything, actually), but I can get out and about a little bit and have been getting some things done around the house. Mostly I am feeling good that if I have the baby, it will most likely need very little interventions and should be able to come home after just a brief stay in the NICU. Still, I'm crossing my fingers and my toes that he stays in a few more weeks so he can skip the NICU all together! We also have a LOT of nursery prep to still complete, so there's that. I'm fully prepared to not finish it before he's born, but it just gets so much harder once they're here that I'm afraid we'll never finish! Small problems. 

"Couch rest" as I've been calling it, is not so bad. Being in the hospital was rough and I was just so bored, but being home has given me the illusion that I'm just having some extra downtime to get stuff done. A lot can be done from a couch, people: laundry folding, baby-book completion (thanks for that suggestion!), girl clothing purging and organizing, reality TV watching, online shopping...some days I feel quite productive! 

As far as the pregnancy goes, I'm feeling pretty good. So very different from last time in just about every way. I honestly never felt quite so giant as I do now. Sleep is getting more challenging by the day, as is life in general. Just the normal woes: hard to shave my legs, hard to get off the floor after lego sessions with my gal, and I have quite the waddle going on. The biggest thing has probably been my immune system, or lack there of. I got a wicked cough just as I was discharged from the hospital that lingered and lingered, and now I am fighting a sinus cold. Ugh. This little guy is sucking the life out of me ;)

Here's the latest belly shot! Taken about a week ago.

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

This is Hard

I'm not really sure where to start.
This has not been easy. I have been contracting on and off for several weeks and have had many visits to L+D to be checked. My house has also been struck with so many stomach bugs this year that it (literally) makes me barf. My sweet hubs just got pneumonia and was out of commission for a week. It just hasn't been all that great around here for the last 6 weeks or so! 
I really started contracting on Thursday when I was 28 4/7 weeks and I was admitted to L+D for monitoring, betamethasone treatment to help mature the baby's lungs, and some tocolytics. Almost a week later, I am here in that same space of wait and watch, dilated to 3cm, hoping and wishing that this baby stays in for many more weeks. And there is absolutely nothing that I can do but hope and lay in bed. Awesome. 

I go between feeling semi-at peace with the situation and my lack of control and the opposite extreme of feeling pissed off that this is happening and super anxious at what the outcome will be and the long road ahead. The thought of staying in the hospital many more weeks is daunting, but even more so is the thought of having a baby is the NICU for many weeks. So I'm focusing on staying pregnant. But damn. Every single time my daughter and husband leave the hospital at night, I die. They are both handling this like rock stars: Daddy in full awesome Daddy and house-husband mode, and Piper her sweet, blissful two-year-old self, seemingly unaware of how weird this situation is. For that I am super grateful.

So now we wait; everyday a little closer to my due date and baby a little stronger and bigger. Good thoughts for a quiet and calm uterus and a healthy baby are appreciated!

Wednesday, February 10, 2016


Week 17 brought a big ol' belly pop. It's 100% apparent that I'm pregnant now, which I love because I don't feel like I look so fat! I did finally invest in some new clothes: a couple pairs of jeans and some non-maternity shirts that are cute but and should see me through most of my pregnancy. It's amazing what a little wardrobe update did for my feeling of cuteness. I went from feeling totally frumpy to kinda cute. 
Physically, I am feeling pretty great almost all of the time with very few food aversions left over from the first trimester! I even have started adding some decaf lattes into my morning mix, which if you know me means that I am getting back to normal ;)
The only big news is the upcoming ultrasound...a couple more weeks until we find out the gender. I am SO MUCH MORE IMPATIENT this time around for some reason. I feel pretty different than I did last time, so I'm putting my money on a boy! I just want to know. Now.
Not many symptoms except for hiccups!

How amazing is a non-maternity shirt with strategically-place buttons for belly growth!?

Friday, January 29, 2016

Weekly Updates Start...Now!

16 weeks, guys. 
It's big for me. I don't quite know why. 4 monthsish. Crazy talk.

It is FLYING by for the most part, even though the embryo transfer feels like it was a long time ago. I am feeling much more pregnant than I did at this point last time. I am bigger (like, a lot bigger), some back pain, hungry all.the.time. and just overall feeling pregnant.

The hardest part of the whole thing for me is how yucky I feel. Physically I am pretty much better, but the first 14-15 weeks were really, really bad. Sick and tired, heartburn, grossness. I feel almost 100% better now, but I think those weeks took a toll on me. 
Last time I felt cute and like I looked pretty good through the end. This time I feel like a run-down whale. Part of this is because I'm legitimately huge and part of this is because I'm not energetic enough to care a whole lot about how I'm dressed and made up. I'm going to try to change this.
I think I'm giving myself more "free passes" related to pregnancy this go around. If I want another cookie, I've been eating another cookie. But I stepped on the scale at my last OB appointment and almost lost my mind. Also, I tried to put on some jeans that I wore through my third trimester last time and I literally could not get them over my ass. So...healthy snacking is in order. And new clothes.

I have not taken many pictures of myself either (which I know I will regret later), so I'm going to make a very big effort to take weekly photos and post a weekly update so I have something to look back on! 

Week sixteen was a pretty good one (aside from the pants incident!)
I am definitely feeling some little baby movements now and they are much more than just flutters! It is so fun! I can't wait to be able to feel them on the outside!!!
I feel like my energy has picked up a little too, so that's been a welcome treat.
This week also brought a lot more baby talk at work because the news is slowly reaching everyone. I didn't do a formal announcement or social media announcement, so it has really been word of mouth and lots of suspicious belly glances :)

Without further ado...the bump.

Happy weekend, friends!

Sunday, December 13, 2015

Double Digits

So, ten weeks. 
I'm fairly convinced that time is actually slowing down and that the last two weeks actually were as long as they seemed. This may be because I am so freaking nauseous all the time. Or it might be because both my toddler and I got the stomach flu and were laid up for what felt like an eternity. 
I'm trying to be mindful of my complaining because (duh) I've wished for every symptom known to man to hit me if only I'd be pregnant, and here I am blissfully living it out. But in the moment the constant nausea is actually giving me quite the run for my money. I also have a lovely mix of heartburn most of the time...and WHY SO EARLY?!?!?

The ninth week felt pretty monumental. I feel like something changed and I was hit with all the stuff. Aside from the nausea that I will refrain from going on and on about, I just feel different. I am pretty rundown looking and feeling most of the time. I attribute this to eating all the bad food and to my sweet little lady who has decided to wake up between 4 and 5 every morning crying. Please say there is an end to this...two year molars? As I hear her loud wails echo through our house, I think about a sleeping newborn not sleeping through any of it and the chaos that two crying children could cause. Am I getting a bit ahead of myself?
The heartburn is a weird thing that lingers much of the day. I do remember having heartburn early last time, but not this early. I have started drinking a swig of diluted apple cider vinegar in water and it has worked like a charm so far! I hope that continues to be the miracle cure!
The baby bump is there already as well. I have not taken any pictures yet, but plan to start soon. I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to keep this mum because damn. Large and in charge. I supposed that speaks to the state of my abs at the moment...or lack thereof. Or muscle memory! 

We went to our first OB appointment yesterday and got to see the little one again on ultrasound! I had forgotten how much better the RE machine in comparison. No measurements were done, no heart rate calculated, just a quick little peek. We did get a glimpse of the arms and legs- not as blobby looking! 
Because I had a kinda preemie last time around, I will take progesterone once a week starting at 18 weeks. The relief I felt when I found out it was weekly was profound! My numb and lumpy booty cheeks might have actually smiled. Other than the progesterone, there is not much of anything that they'll be doing differently except for more cervical checks (I forgot to ask how often).  

Next step is the nuchal translucency scan at 13ish weeks (right after Christmas). Luckily, I think this will be a pretty painless wait since I am so busy and have so much to do between now and then!

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

All a flutter

The little niblet is bigger and the heart is still fluttering away! Holy bleep. 

Tuesday, December 1, 2015


I little snippet into my life right now: nausea. 
Oh god, the nausea. 
Heartburn, yuck. 
Oh yeah, I'm pregnant! I almost forgot in the chaos that is the life of a Mom of a 22-month-old. Maybe I should check what the miscarriage rates for today are since I'm probably not pregnant anymore. 
Am I feeling cramping? 
Shit, are my underwear wet? 
I'm bleeding. I must be bleeding. blood. Fab. 
Oh no, I might throw up. Must eat immediately. 
So bloated. So fat.

I thought that maybe I might be less nervous this time around, but it seems that the first trimester is just as much of a bitch the second time around. Maybe worse, honestly.
The symptoms are there much of the time, like whoa, but other times I feel nothing. Why, oh why has no one invented a portable ultrasounds machine for post-infertility preggos?!?!

I have ultrasound #2 with my RE tomorrow, which I hope will put my mind slightly at ease for 2.5 minutes. Then first the first OB appointment in scheduled for next Friday. Since my last pregnancy ended in a slightly preterm birth, this time I'm considered high risk so am going to start seeing a maternal fetal medicine specialist instead of the run-of-the-mill OB I saw last time. I have no idea what this means or if anything will be different, but I guess I'll find out next week! I have an inkling that I will continue progesterone injections throughout the pregnancy (hoping for only once a week, but the RE wasn't sure). My ass cheeks are starting to get pretty lumpy and sore, but I could definitely handle it if it was only every 7 days instead of every. single. day. 

We shared the news with our immediate families over the Thanksgiving holiday and shocked everyone! Pretty drastically different than the last time when they were all waiting for it impatiently! I was really surprised that my Mom didn't guess before since I was SUPER tired and nauseous for the few days leading up to the announcement. 

So, that's life now! I am going to start posting weekly updates because I feel like I need to document this time in some way or it will pass in a flash and I won't remember anything. It's just so different than last time where I obsessed over everyday and moment!